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By Deer Tribe / In June 21, 2024


Part of our Tyrants blog series where you will learn the many faces of the tyrants. You will learn about the other tyrants of life like time, situations, space and the environment. You will also learn about the people called “Two-Legged Tyrants” and what their focus is for tyranting you. You will clearly see how you opened the door and let the tyrant in. Best of all, this series teaches you how to stop any tyrant from stealing your life force energy and how to count coup and gain the true teaching for both you and the tyrant.

In each of the tyrants we will begin with a story to give an example of what this tyrant is like and how to count coup on them.



George Thomas sat at his workbench in the garage appreciating the neatness. He had spent many hours organizing his tools and equipment, right down to the tape measurer. George valued his tools and was taught from an early age to have respect for them. Everything has a place and everything in its place was his motto, George’s thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the side door. As he looked out the window he saw Ed Gasner his next-door neighbor. A feeling of dread came over George and his mind began to flood with memories of their past encounters. Ed was a habitual borrower who had a knack for borrowing things usually when George was busy on a project. There were many times when Ed didn’t return what he had borrowed, or it came back broken or dirty. Also, Ed was forever talking about nothing, and as a result, interfered with George’s concentration. It seemed to George that Ed moved right into his space and began to handle all his tools. Ed would open drawers, take things off the wall and actually rearrange the placement of certain tools. All the time talking incessantly about the situation that required him to borrow from George.

The knock on the door awakened George from his dreadful memories. He slowly moved toward the door thinking to himself “I hope this guy isn’t coming over to borrow something.” But George knew the truth of the matter – Ed always borrowed his tools and many times before he had given in to Ed’s requests or just blasted him. At first George was feeling a bit insecure about being able to stop Ed and then he said to himself, “No sir, this time I must do something different to stop Ed’s bothersome behavior once and for all.”

As George opened the door, he focused his energy and relaxed. As Ed began his usual way of making a nuisance by asking trivial questions, George suddenly knew what to do to handle this tyrant. Ed said “You know, George, my lawn mower broke down last month and I was wondering if I could borrow yours for a while.” It was obvious that Ed had no idea that his habitual borrowing and petty behavior had any effect on George at all. So when George responded, Ed was shocked. George stayed very calm and focused and said “Sure, Ed, you can borrow my lawn mower, but here are my conditions. You must bring the lawn mower back by nightfall. It must be in the same good shape or better as you see it now. Furthermore, if you break anything on it you will pay me three times what it costs to repair it. And if you aren’t willing to comply, you may never borrow anything from me again, so don’t ask.”

By this time Ed’s mouth was moving, but no words were coming out of it. It was the first time George had ever seen Ed speechless. George felt great and in charge around Ed for once. Finally when Ed could utter some words, he said to George, “I think I will go down to the rental store and get a lawn mower to use. Thanks anyway.”



The exasperating, bothersome, nuisance, petty tyrant is irritating and seems to always be in the way. They often come over uninvited and overstay their welcome. This tyrant seems to have very poor timing and not consciously aware of what they are provoking in you. Their self-indulgence shows that they think the world revolves around them.

Underlying Cause

The petty tyrant is unable to receive or take in feelings of power. Therefore, out of a fear of powerlessness they engage in petty behavior because they don’t know how to get what they want any other way. Because this tyrant is unaware of their petty behavior, they are unable to grow and develop out of this state. They are in illusion and unable to give away to life with passion, thus continuing the petty behavior.

Unconscious Motivation

Although they come with what they think is a simple request, through their petty nuisance behavior it is clear that getting attention is their primary motivation. In fact it is this need that drives their behavior. In our teachings, we say that attention is power. If this tyrant can get your attention they can delude themselves with the illusion that they have power. In fact they do exert power over you if you give in to them. Remember this is the underlying cause of the petty, nuisance tyrant’s behavior.

Impact of the tyrant

This tyrant is trying to throw off your choreography by disrupting what you are doing and what is important to you. What is really going on in your Inner Tyrant is that you doubt your ability to deal effectively with this tyrant and take correct action to stop the tyranting behavior. Your inability to take correct action with this tyrant makes you lose your focus and get stressed out. Before you know what has happened, you lose control of your emotions and you are out of balance. When this happens you’re the prey for the desires of this tyrant and you lose energy at every encounter.

Common reactions to this tyrant are to blast them or ignore them. In the first instance the tyrant has hooked you, you are out of emotional control and they have the attention from you they were seeking. In the second instance ignoring them only sets them deeper into their need for attention and the tyranting behavior comes on even stronger.

This tyrant counts on you not setting any boundaries and limitations or rules in relationship to their pettiness. When you don’t, they begin to move your boundaries farther back. There are no rules that the petty tyrant plays by because they are not conscious of their pettiness. They know if they persist, eventually they will get their way.

Write down the names of those in your immediate circle of influence who are this kind of tyrant to you.

Join us on the next blog as we take a closer look at this tyrant. See what you need to do to count coup on this tyrant and be at cause in your circle.

Excerpted from “A Course of Study, Series B: Module 2: The Tyrants of Life″, written by Mary Flaming Crystal Mirror. 

#DTMMS #DeerTribe #Heal #Change #Grow #SharingKnowledgeThatWorks

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